Cosplay and Respect: This Dude Did It Wrong

Before PAX East opened to the public I got a chance to step inside the exhibit room around 9:40 am to check out some of the amazing booths and displays of this year’s convention. I was standing in front of a giant TV screen showing off footage of some intense game graphics at the Crystal Dynamics booth. I’ll be honest, I’m not an expert or up to date with every bit of gamer news or cosplay who’s who, so I had no idea who this person was that came up to me and said; “I love your tie!” It so happened I had on one of those 8-bit ThinkGeek.com ties to go along with my suit. I turned to this cheery girl working the booth, gave her a huge smile, blushed a little, and said, “Why thank you!” We started talking about the booth she was at as she was on point and very knowledgeable with everything, I was so impressed and glad to have made this my first stop at PAX.

Later on in the convention the boss told me I had an interview scheduled with a very famous cosplayer by the name of Meagan Marie, so we headed upstairs to meet with her. She got finished with a large panel discussion, we walked up to her and she gave a huge smile to me and said; “I know you! You’re the guy with the tie! We were talking downstairs!” I had absolutely no idea that I was chatting with Meagan Marie earlier that morning! We both laughed as I admitted that I didn’t recognize her earlier and we continued with the interview which she carried on brilliantly, comfortably, and with confident passion for her work.

Three days after PAX, I was very displeased to read her most recent post regarding a very unpleasant series of incidents in her career; http://meagan-marie.tumblr.com/post/46396481491/what-would-you-do-if-you-werent-afraid. I was displeased in knowing of the incident that happened at this PAX where a press guy asked some very inappropriate questions to a group of cosplayers, and then proceeded to harass Meagan.

Let me start off by taking my gloves off, sound good? What kind of complete a—ole, douchebag, and pathetic loser of a broken tool do you have to be to start something like this? People complain how strict PAX is with their press passes and then someone with a press pass makes a statement to a group of cosplayers; “I bet none of the guys here can please you in bed.” First, this guy shows evidence of a growing problem in the whole convention world; just because you have a press pass doesn’t mean you have professional work ethic as a member of the press. It’s clear to me some people want press passes just to get into cons for free but we’ll save that for another time. This guy will clearly make PAX even stricter on their press passes I’m sure for next year. Second, he’s wrong, nerds are better lovers; http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/commentary/sexdrive/2007/04/sexdrive_0406 they are far better in bed by official surveys (http://www.forevergeek.com/2009/05/geeks_are_better_in_bed_its_official/) Third, what this guy was actually saying is he doubts himself in bed. It’s the classic defense mechanism, the whole “my penis is bigger than yours” argument, when it all comes down to the fact you have zero confidence in your own self that you need to insult others or a group of others. By claiming everyone in the convention can’t please these girls in bed is to imply attention onto himself that he is their sole love messiah. How did that work out Mr. Douche?

But reason #3 stems to a bigger issue at hand here, and that’s as guys who are geeks we can almost all relate to hardships and heartbreak with girls in our past. I was there myself, and that frustration, disappointment, sadness, depression, and utter hopelessness eventually leads to anger and resentment at some point. Most of us evolve and grow into men, but sadly a lot of others become raging balls of douchebaggery. This lack of understanding and fulfillment of the opposite sex stays with them, so even if he becomes a game developer he will still make rude comments to a woman such as; “Oh sorry I didn’t recognize you with your clothes on.”

Guys, we all have a penis, but having one does not make you a man, your control over it does. A girl can be dressed in a ski suit or a bikini and that does not change who she is or how she deserves to be treated. Guess what, women have skin under their clothes, I know, isn’t it shocking? But I started to learn that as an artist when I studied them, I mean for some reason I didn’t see that card fall out of them that said; “please treat me like sh#t cuz my clothes are off”. A woman with less clothing on in a public convention is asking for your trust. They’re vulnerable, exposed, so when you lash out and deny them any sense of respect from your man parts, biology, and self-control you break that trust. It’s okay to tell someone they look incredible, amazing, sexy, or just to compliment them. But there is a huge difference between telling someone they’re super cute and telling them they’re a total skank who’s asking for it.

My feedback to you Meagan, and to the cosplayers you were with, is to get pissed, draw the line, and don’t stand for this crap. We’re sorry that this happened to you as no woman deserves that. There are also many men like myself who are disgusted by such behavior in other guys, and while we really really really want to hit a—oles like that with a giant ice chilled cod from the frozen coast of Greenland (don’t ask how I come up with this stuff) the reality is we need to do our best to teach other guys how to become men, I just like to start my lessons off with a whack from a frozen fish is all.